Bermuda is exactly the kind of place where you don’t miss the internet.

Could this be me one day?

I work out every day.  I’m strong and athletic, but not at all coordinated.  I’m in great shape, but holy jebus, snowboarding kicked my ass.  Did you know there are muscles in the backs of your knees?  I didn’t, but mine are sore today.  I broke nothing and I bled not a drop.  I fell a few times, but far fewer than I expected.  I’m a little battered and bruised, and sore pretty much everywhere.  That said, I’m sure I’ll mend quickly, and when I do, I’d gladly try snowboarding some more.  Just not today.

My lesson was yesterday at 9:30, but I was so nervous that I woke up at 5.  I spent four hours trying to fight off visions of horrendous wipeouts before I made it up to the Burton Snowboarding Academy at Northstar for my lesson.  The Academy is located up on the mountain, so you have to ride a gondola to get there.  I shared my gondola with three skiers who told me that I would have a great time and that everyone they know who takes lessons here does very well.  That was good to hear, and calmed my nerves somewhat.

When I checked in for my lesson, Adrienne at the Burton Academy fitted me with a board and boots, and put my boots on for me like my mother did when I was a little girl going out to sled in the back yard.  If she hadn’t been there to help, I’d probably still be trying to jam my right foot into the thing, or struggling with the laces.  Thanks, Adrienne!  Next, she took my lunch order –

“Oh, for after the lesson?  That’s nice…”
“No,” she said, “for the break — your lesson goes until 3:30.”

Oh wow.  Would I survive that long?

Finally, I met my instructor, Kevin McCarthy, and the lesson got started.  There was only one other student in my class, Megan, who had just a little bit more experience than me.  Kevin said the most they ever put in a group class is four people, so everyone gets lots of personal attention.  He gave us a rundown of what we’d do that day, starting with learning the basics in the mini pipe.

The Superpipe at Northstar

I pictured a smaller version of the half pipes I’d seen in the X-games, but I really should’ve chilled out.  The mini pipe has about a 2% grade on each “slope.”  This I could handle.

Kevin first went over safety and form, and then helped us strap into our boards.  I learned that I’m a goofy-footer, meaning right foot in front when I ride.  Apparently this is backwards from the norm.  Of course.  We went one at a time, with Kevin pushing us side to side and holding us steady as we practiced some basic moves on the mini pipe.  I was pretty good at these basics, and started to get cocky.

Even working on the basics on the very tame mini pipe was quite a workout, and the three of us were all shedding layers within a few minutes of getting started.  It was a beautiful sunny day on the mountain, and 35 degrees felt like a Phoenix summer.  But after my first fall, I decided being hot was better than crashing with no padding.

Soon, Kevin decided we were ready to start riding downhill.  I did not agree, but Kevin was the expert and I didn’t want to hold Megan back.  He took us about 20 yards up a very slight hill and asked us how it looked.  “No problem,” said Megan.  “Like a black diamond,” I thought.  We went down one at a time, working on the basics we’d learned on the mini pipe.  Kevin rode down with each of us, gently holding on and guiding us down, telling us what to do with our bodies.  A few more tries and he took us even higher on the same hill, eventually letting go and letting us ride on our own.  Megan caught on way faster than I did — I’d left my confidence in the mini pipe.

The Big Easy slope looked big, but not easy when I first stepped onto my snowboard.

After a third run down this small but intimidating hill, Kevin told us we were going to the chair lift for some real runs.  My heartbeat registered a 5 on the Richter Scale.  I hadn’t really fallen yet — a couple of slow wipeouts, but I was sure my time was nigh.

The chair lift was one of the most challenging parts of the day.  Kevin used a picnic bench to show us how it would work with our snowboards, and had us practice getting off.  I still hadn’t mastered it when we got in line, but he rode next to me so he could pull me up like a momma cat when it was time to dismount.  This worked pretty well, but I was nervous every time.

The first time down the hill, Kevin held me lightly by my waist so he could guide me, and I made it all the way down without wiping out, but I felt that if my teacher hadn’t been there, I would probably have flown head first into the nearest tree.  I still had no idea how to control my board.  We got on the lift again, and this time Kevin said he wasn’t going to be so hands on.  Yikes…

At the top of the Big Easy, Kevin went over steering and control with me one more time, then pointed my board in the right direction, gave me a push, and sent me down on my own.  Without him there, it was amazing how my instincts kicked in.  I was able to control my speed very well, and even direction for the most part.  I was probably going slower than walking speed, but I made it down all by myself without wiping out.  It’s a good thing, too, because I never did master getting up on my own.  It requires a kind of flexibility that I just don’t have.

When we broke for lunch, I was able to relax for the first time all day, and I realized just how tense I’d been.  I was having fun in the snow, but I could’ve used a couple more hours on the couch before heading back out there…

Riding on a full stomach is dicey.  You sort of get into that food coma state, and it’s harder to balance and focus.  I had my first real wipeout on our first run after lunch.  I caught myself with my hands as I fell backward, which is exactly why wrist injuries are the most common snowboarding injuries.  You’re supposed to just let yourself fall on your bum, or on your elbows if you’re falling forward.  Unfortunately, the instinct to catch yourself is pretty strong, and I sprained my right wrist.  I kept going, though…

Here’s the part of the story where I admit that I’m a little bit stupid.  I have chronic coccyx (tailbone) pain.  It used to be really bad all the time, but now it doesn’t really bother me much.  Still, I knew that snowboarding would involve a lot of falling on my tush, and I knew I was asking for trouble.  On the next run, I was doing pretty well.  I was on my own, heading down the steepest hill of the day.  At the very end of the run, my board turned and I started going faster than I was comfortable with.  Trying to regain control, I lost my balance and fell back, hard.  With already tender wrists, I just let myself fall on my butt…and I was done for the day.

If it hadn’t been for my chronic pain issues, this fall would’ve stung, but I would’ve been fine in a minute.  I’d pushed my own limits enough, though, and I left after about 5 hours of riding.

This is what I’ll learn at my next lesson

Going into yesterday’s lesson, I had ZERO experience, and I had extreme clumsiness working against me.  I never would’ve imagined doing half of what I was able to do in just one lesson.  Sure I’m sore and achy today, but that’s just because I was using so many of these muscles for the first time ever.  Kevin was an incredible instructor, and the Burton Academy method works.  Megan was also a total newbie, and she was an all star by the end of the day.  If I can do this, anyone can.  I’ll need another lesson or two before I’m comfortable on the slopes on my own, but I’ll get there.  I’ll be back at Tahoe in March, and I plan to make another date with Kevin then.

When Adrienne checked me into the Academy yesterday, she asked me what my goal for the lesson would be.  I said “not dying.”  Mission accomplished, and then some.  I think it’s actually reasonable now to amend my snowboarding goal to “proficiency.”

Check out the Burton Academy at Northstar for skiing or snowboarding lessons.  Those people are miracle workers.  If only they had a way to make me look less dorky in my goggles…

McKenzie and I had a few days to kill between our bridge tournament in Reno and a visit to Lake Tahoe (where I will attempt to learn to snowboard — you won’t want to miss Tuesday’s blog), so we found the cheapest hotel the internet had to offer in Sparks, Nevada, about 5 minutes outside of Reno.  We’re at Western Village Inn & Casino, a cheap but not grungy hotel that’s actually been quite satisfying.

When we booked the room, we were told we had a beach view — we assumed this was a typo, but whaddya know, our third floor window looks right out over a cute little lake, complete with paddle boats, a boardwalk, and even a small beach.

Across the parking lot is the casino part of the establishment.  It’s not a large casino, but it’s got a lot going on.  Everyone says the steakhouse inside is worth the trip, but this vegetarian stuck to the Marina Cafe.  Western Village is owned by Peppermill, which is immediately clear from the neon Lisa Frank color scheme.  The cafe menu will be very familiar to anyone who’s ever dined at the Peppermill restaurant:  a large selection of burgers, sandwiches, and ethnic dishes, and breakfast all day.  Come with an empty stomach because the portions are enormous, and the prices are incredibly low.  I recommend the omelets.

The casino itself is loads of fun.  It’s small, but there’s a lot to offer — slot machines and video games in all denominations, a sports book, and low-limit table games: $0.25 roulette, $1 craps, and $2, $3, and $5 blackjack (for high rollers).  Craps rules are okay — single roll bets pay 30-to-1, but you can only play double odds on any point.  Hey, it’s a dollar.  The blackjack rules are fantastic, though — all single deck, double down on any two, and blackjack pays 3 to 2.

The dealers here are some of the area’s friendliest.  Stop by the Western Village casino and say hi to my new friends at the craps table — Jacob, Roger, and Brian on the day shift, and Robert, Warren, and Ron on the evening shift.  These guys are a blast.  Don’t forget to tip the dealers, win or lose.  It’s good casino karma.

If you’ve got business in Reno, Western Village is just a 5-minute drive from the city, and it’s a great place to stay if you’re looking for a cheap room and good food and gaming.  When you check in, you’ll be given a pile of coupons for free drinks, free bets, meal discounts, and more.  It’s not a luxury resort by any stretch, but it’s a great value — and it’s got a beach view!

In the two days leading up to this morning’s ribbon cutting at the new Ritz-Carlton Highlands, Lake Tahoe, over 30 inches of snow fell at the Northstar-at-Tahoe summit.  The brand new resort opens to a winter wonderland that couldn’t have been scripted better.

Photo courtesy of the Ritz-Carlton Highlands, Lake Tahoe

The beautiful Ritz-Carlton resort is the first all-new resort at Lake Tahoe in decades.  The contemporary design is modeled after the great early-20th century mountain lodges, particularly inspired by the Ahwahnee in Yosemite and the Timberline Lodge on Mt. Hood (aka this writer’s favorite place in the world).  The finished product is a gorgeous, rustic building full of modern luxuries.

Guests will enjoy ski-in, ski-out access and mountain concierge services.  As with any Ritz-Carlton property, you’ll find top quality dining and spa services at the Ritz-Carlton Highlands.  The resort’s signature restaurant is Manzanita, created by award-winning San Francisco chef Traci Des Jardins.

The 17,000 square foot spa is designed around a water and woods theme — try one of the signature water therapy treatments to unwind after a day on the slopes, or take advantage of the state-of-the-art fitness center in the spa, including group classes and a co-ed outdoor heated lap pool with breathtaking views of the mountain slopes.

The Ritz-Carlton brand is committed to eco-friendly luxury.  The new Ritz-Carlton Highlands resort is seeking LEED certification from the US Green Building Council.  The resort features underground parking instead of asphalt lots, recycled steel, a pedestrian-friendly layout, energy efficient heating and cooling, and public transit in the form of the Highlands Gondola, which connects the resort with the nearby Village-at-Northstar.

I’ll be stopping by the new Ritz-Carlton Highlands, Lake Tahoe in a few weeks to see it for myself.  Wish me luck on the slopes — I’ll probably need it.  It’s a good thing there’s a spa on site…

What’s the best view you’ve ever had from a hotel room?  The New York City skyline?  The ski slopes on your favorite mountain?  The sparkling blue waters of the Caribbean?  All of these are impressive, but none could possibly compare to a hotel room that sees 15 sunrises per day.

Galactic Suite, the world’s first outer space resort, orbits Earth every 80 minutes.  You’ll get spectacular views of the whole planet from one of these rooms.  Each pod can hold up to four guests and two pilots.  When the space hotel opens in 2012, there will be just one pod, but Galactic Suite expects to expand their operations as demand rises.

Fitness onboard the Space Resort

Starting at a cool $4.4 million, you can purchase a 3-day stay in the space resort.  The price includes a 16-week training course designed by the Galactic Suite medical team to prepare space tourists for the zero-gravity life as well as emergency situations that may arise.  Space tourists may be allowed to include friends and family in the training course, even if they will not be traveling to the space hotel.  The training facility includes life-size Galactic Suite Space Resort models and simulators.

To reach the accommodations, space tourists will be launched into space on the Galactic Suite Spacecraft, reaching speeds of over 17,000 miles per hour — sure to be one of the most thrilling parts of the space tourism experience.

I’m curious about the cuisine at the space hotel.  With no restaurants nearby and no room service, what will dining be like?  Galactic Suite has this to say:

“We cannot reveal what kinds of meals they will eat yet.  However, the project has developed new concepts in space cuisine, as it is not just about bringing Earth food into space to eat it there, but also about developing new ways of eating.  Eating in the Galactic Suite will become a game, playing not only with the food, but also its packaging.”

Intriguing.  And a little bit frightening…

While some critics contend that a 2012 launch date (har har) is a lofty ambition for Galactic Suite, the space resort has already received over 200 inquiries and over 40 reservations.  At a cost of millions and several months of training for a three-day stay, this isn’t exactly a program that brings space tourism to the masses, but it’s a big step closer.  Maybe space travel will be the norm for the next generation — who knows?

Attention bargain hunters!  Today is a good day to start scanning for a deal on a cruise.  The annual World’s Largest Cruise Night, an industry-wide discount extravaganza, is today.  Travel agents and cruise lines are offering deals for vacations on over a dozen different cruise lines.  Many of these offers will last through the week or longer, but you should hurry to find the best bargains.

Over 1,300 travel agents in the US will be holding open-house style events to promote their cruise deals; several thousand other agents are holding online events.  Are these the best deals of the year?  Probably not — and with the cruise industry aching as it has been, these certainly won’t be the last bargains you’ll find, but it is a great time to comparison shop and snatch up a great deal.

A lot of the offers include on board credits for each cabin purchased, anywhere from $50 – $300 cash back per cabin to spend on the ship.  Remember, though, that $300 cash back isn’t really a bargain if you pay $500 more for the ticket — keep an eye on the bottom line.  USA Today printed a comprehensive list of the deals available through the World’s Largest Cruise Night event.  I haven’t crunched all the numbers, but some of the best-looking deals are below:

• Royal Caribbean is giving travel agents a choice of offering their customers up to $200 off per cabin, onboard credits of up to $100 or special amenities on bookings made by Friday.
• Azamara Cruises is giving onboard credits between $300 and $500 to travelers who book 2010 European cruises by Friday.  The credit will depend on cabin category.
• Avalon Waterways, a river cruise line, is offering half-off airfare on all 2010 air-inclusive European river cruise vacations booked by October 31st.
• Possibly the biggest discount of the event comes from AMAWATERWAYS, a European luxury river cruise line, which is currently offering up to $1,000 per cabin discounts on select November and December cruises and up to $500 per cabin off on select April and May sailings booked by the end of October.

If any of these deals look good to you, give your travel agent a call.  A cruise getaway would make a nice early holiday surprise for your family.  Bon voyage!

I think I’ve found the perfect time of year to visit Florida:  right now.  This week, I find myself in sunny Naples, a medium-sized city on southwest Florida’s gulf coast.  Kids are in school, families are settled into their routines, and the snowbirds that migrate here for winter won’t arrive for a few weeks yet.  The water is warm and the beaches are empty.  In short, it’s perfect here.

Another bonus — we’re not in peak travel season, so hotel rates are lower and you should be able to find a bargain on a rental car.  If you’re jonesing for an easy beach getaway, think about the Florida gulf coast.  It’s quieter than hotspots like Miami and Orlando, but still has the same Florida sunshine.

Naples Grande Beach Resort

You’ll want to find accommodations near the water to take maximum advantage of all the ocean has to offer.  It doesn’t get much nicer than the Naples Grande Beach Resort (where I’ve been playing bridge and enjoying the pool all week).  After a grueling session at the card table on Wednesday, my bridge partner and I went to check out the beach.  Aside from a few folks enjoying some afternoon cocktails at the clubhouse, the oceanfront was all but deserted.  The water was clear, warm, and welcoming, and while we were floating around in the light waves (the surf is never really intense on Florida’s west coast), a family of dolphins surfaced just a few feet away, and played there by the shore for about thirty minutes.

Dolphins playing in the Gulf of Mexico

Confession:  the above is not my photograph — I was in the water with them, my camera was not.  But these are dolphins in the gulf.  This is pretty much what it looked like, a common sight in these parts.

You’ll want to be back out on the beach at sunset — early evening this time of year.  Remember, you’re on the west coast, so you get some pretty spectacular views.

Sunset on Florida's Gulf Coast

If you don’t want to spend all your time on the beach, there’s plenty more to see and do.  Check out the Florida Everglades or Corkscrew Swamp, where you can get up close with all kinds of wildlife — watch out for gators!  There’s also lots of great outlet shopping in the area, and plenty of pro sports teams within a short drive.

Right here in southwest Florida, right now in October, it’s the perfect time to enjoy a vacation — you can either pack it with activity, or enjoy a week or so of doing absolutely nothing.  Either way, this is a great time and place to do it.

Millions of people around the world have ditched this year’s vacation plans due to the sad state of the economy.  In times like these, most of us have to cut back, and it’s important to focus on our savings.  But too much work without any fun mixed in can mean burnout city.  A quick partial-week getaway could be just what you need to de-stress and recharge, and right now there are some incredible deals available.  Go ahead and talk yourself into it — or allow me…

Beach Gazebo at the Ritz-Carlton St. Thomas

Spending a little bit of money and taking a little bit of time for yourself will go a long way toward your overall productivity and happiness, which will pay dividends both at work and at home.  Several Ritz-Carlton hotels in the Caribbean and Mexico are currently offering phenomenal deals — it’s the perfect excuse to treat yourself to some well-deserved luxury relaxation in these times of persistent stress.

Check this out:

Pool at the Ritz-Carlton San Juan

Book Four Nights and Pay for Only Three

The Ritz-Carlton, Cancun- Rates from $269 per night

The Ritz-Carlton, San Juan – Rates from $199 per night

The Ritz-Carlton, St. Thomas – Rates from $279 per night

The Ritz-Carlton Golf & Spa Resort, Rose Hall, Jamaica – Rates from $169 per night

Another deal available at the Ritz-Carlton Golf & Spa Resort in Rose Hall is the Escape to Luxury package, an all-inclusive vacation deal starting at $409 per night.  Children under 12 dine and stay complimentary when accompanied by an adult, and kids 13-17 get special discounts as well.  You’ll get your fifth night free when you book four nights.

Book Five Nights and Pay for Only Four

The Ritz-Carlton, Grand Cayman – Rates from $299 per night

Availability will vary by location, and you must book between now and December 1, 2009 for travel between now and December 15, 2009 to take advantage of these offers.  If you’ve got vacation days that you have to spend by the end of the year, this would be the perfect way to use them!  Ask about special rates and offers for children when you book, and you may find even more bargains.

Ritz-Carlton Grand Cayman

Everyone deserves a little escape, and you’ll be hard pressed to find a nicer way to vacation for better prices than these.  If you allow yourself to forget your stresses for a few days, you’ll come back to the real world much better equipped to handle them all.  Go ahead and get away.

Over the past couple of posts here, you’ve seen me rave on about what a wonderful time I had on my first trip to Hawaii, staying at the Ritz-Carlton Kapalua and Kapalua Villas at Kapalua Resort.  It was amazing.  I heard from other travelers about how amazing the rest of Hawaii is, too.  I’ll be going back as soon as I can make it happen.  Maybe, just maybe, I’ll get lucky and win a trip — maybe we both can.

Here’s our chance:  Marriott Resorts Hawaii is running a social media contest that’s going on right now.  25 lucky winners will receive all-expense paid trips for two to a designated Marriott resort on Kauai, Oahu, Maui, or Hawaii’s Big Island by simply submitting a Twitter handle, Facebook connection or email address at the contest website.  You can enter via Twitter, Facebook, and email, and the winners are announced on Twitter — just sign up to follow @MarriottHawaii to see if you win!  Ahem, while we’re on the subject — I know I’m way late to this party, but you can now follow me on Twitter, too.  I’m @jianantonic, and you should totally add @TwoliaOnline, too.

Okay, more about the contest — here’s a breakdown of what winners will receive:

• Roundtrip for two on Hawaiian Airlines from any of its ten U.S. West Coast gateway cities: Seattle, Portland, Las Vegas, Phoenix, Sacramento, Oakland, San Francisco, San Jose, Los Angeles and San Diego.
• A five-night stay at one of Marriott resorts in Hawaii: JW Marriott Ihilani Resort & Spa, Waikiki Beach Marriott Resort & Spa, Kauai Marriott Resort & Beach Club, Wailea Beach Marriott Resort & Spa or Waikoloa Beach Marriott Resort & Spa.
• Rental car, courtesy of Hertz.
• $100 per day resort dining credit.
• Access to fun activities and attractions on all islands.
• Please note:  All trips must be completed by December 20, 2009.  Winners will be announced on Facebook and Twitter, and also will be notified by email.  Winners have 48 hours to claim their prize, or a new winner will be randomly selected.

Sounds pretty sweet, huh?  It gets a little bit sweeter.

A second portion of the contest, if you choose to enter, involves submitting a video on why you love Hawaii for a chance to win a Tweetup Trip for TWELVE!  To enter this contest, submit your YouTube video link to www.marriotthawaiitweets.com by December 20, 2009.  The public will be asked to judge on their favorite from a selection of finalists. The one with the most votes will receive:

• Roundtrip for winner and 11 friends/family, courtesy of Hawaiian Airlines from any of its U.S. West Coast gateway cities.
• Seven-night stay at any two Marriott resorts in Hawaii.
• One luau dinner and show.
• Commemorative Hawaii state quarter.
• Keepsake group photo.
• 25,000 Marriott Rewards Points for winner.

The winner will be selected in January — the perfect time to ditch your snowsuit and put on a bikini and a lei.

If any of you win the trip for 12, remember who told you about this contest!  Do we have a deal?

I’ve been a vegetarian for 18 years.  For nearly the last two decades, every time I’ve gone out to eat, I’ve had at most three choices:  the veggie burger (meh), the pasta (whatever), or the salad (hardly a taste sensation).  When I came to Hawaii, I was prepared to eat a lot of salad in the state known for its delicious seafood.  (I’m a strict vegetarian — eggs and dairy are fine, but no fish.)  I had no idea just how well I was going to eat!  I spent four days at the beautiful Kapalua Resort in Maui, where yes, all of the restaurants specialize in seafood — which I heard from my companions was second to none — but they know how to feed a vegetarian here!  Choices!  I never get choices!  None did it better than the Plantation House Restaurant.

How's this for a view? Looking out from a table at Kapalua Resort's Plantation House Restaurant

Looking over the menu, I was initially a little bummed — there were several amazing fish creations, but it appeared once again I’d be “choosing” the pasta and contenting myself with the view, which was indeed stunning, overlooking the famous Plantation Golf Course and the Pacific Ocean.  As everyone scanned the menu, the server informed our table that the chef would happily prepare any of the fish dishes with a tofu substitute.  Mmm!

I know that many omnivores think “tofu” is a four-letter word, but really it’s all about the preparation, and my tofu dinner was prepared just like the artistic fish dishes my pals got to eat.  For once, I wasn’t halfheartedly picking at a plate of mush or leaves while my omnivore buddies enjoyed the meal of their lives.

Tofu on the left, catch of the day on the right. Images courtesy of Johnny at JohnnyJet.com

Look at that!  Doesn’t it make your mouth water?  This dish was called A Taste of Maui — pistachio-crusted, on Maui onions, local tomatoes, upcountry spinach, with couscous & olive oil.  I really appreciated that even with a diet that excludes the main part of a Hawaiian meal, Chef Alex at the Plantation House made it possible for me to experience a truly Hawaiian meal, and it was phenomenal.

Kapalua Farms Beet Salad -- this was my salad course, for which I would gladly fly back to Maui for one more bite. Image courtesy of Julie Wolfson.

Throughout my stay in Kapalua, I dined at several of the restaurants at the Ritz-Carlton Kapalua and Kapalua Resort property, and I always had choices and always ate very well.  All the restaurants utilize fresh local ingredients for an authentic Hawaiian dining experience.  Every restaurant on the property has several delicious and unique vegetarian options — more choices than I’ve ever had!  I want to extend extra kudos to the Plantation House Restaurant for majorly exceeding this lifelong vegetarian’s expectations.  Home run.